Hey Everyone,
I will be leaving for Australia on Friday and I'll be out until Black Friday. And since that's Thanksgiving weekend, I think it's safe to say we should be spending time with family and friends.
What should we do in the mean time? Since Jacob's not around does that mean that we can't meet as a small group? No. My presence is not required for meetings, nor is any authority required for any of us to gather together in part or as one.
?
Let me explain. Ideally we could all meet together every week. Practically, we know this isn't true. Honestly, I respect that life happens unexpectedly, but practically we can plan ahead most of the time.
In the past few weeks, group attendance has been low, but the quality of the conversation has been high; it's been wonderful to get to know those in attendance and practically discuss how the gospel is affecting our lives. How it effects the jobs we're in, how we interact with our co-workers, how we interact with our family, and how we interact with our pets (I couldn't leave Mindy out of this could I???)
It has been a blessing to spend uninterrupted and unplanned time talking about life & God. Some of our meetings have gone 4 hours, some only 1, some have ended exactly on time. While I recognize this as a blessing now, I didn't see it that way from the start.
My modus operandi is to manage and plan. To have a checklist and do everything on it. Always. All the time. Even if its a proverbial checklist that only exists in my head. It has to be right. It has to be accomplished. It has to be done when it needs to be done. The way my brain works is not the gospel of our LORD Jesus Christ. Jesus faced numerous interruptions, set backs and as far as I can tell didn't have a checklist of things he needed to do, and boy did he get stuff done! Jesus had greater efficiency with less planning. Which doesn't exactly fit my modern mindset.
If Jesus is my LORD and Saviour, then I need to do as he did and practice what he preached, which means letting go of the small group checklist. The study guide? We're not using it anymore. I personally blanched when I heard they were coming out with a new and 'improved' version. the gospel is about people, not management, even though great management can help people grow. I don't think management is what our group needs to grow. And I apologize that in our early meetings this is what was nonverbally communicated.
What are we doing in place of the study guide? Reading the Bible. Or asking the question, what did you think about the sermon? And I'm also discovering that we all aren't making it on Sunday.
It's okay.
?
Let me explain. The Sunday Service is for the edification of the body. If attending on Sunday is not edifying don't do it. If when you think of attending on Sunday, all you hear is the crack of the whip, don't go. Still seek God, still seek Christian community, seek edifying dialogue about this thing we call faith, and you will grow. And maybe you'll come back to Sunday, as I did.
?
Let me explain. I have a love hate relationship with the Church. I'm trained to be pastor, but finding my way into a christian community has been hard; I've felt like an outcast since college. And I've only wanted to be a part of a church where they accept outcasts. Where they find a way of encouraging the lost and confused and help them become whole. And let me tell you I've found a lot of fraudulent churches on my journey.
In some ways I've seen the worst, but I've also had the opportunity to see greatness in the ugliest of places. I've seen so much love in the smallest places that when I go to the larger ones I wonder what happened. Even so, I've seen ugliness in small places and true beauty in the largest ones. Its not the size of the building or the number of people inside that determines our ability to follow the gospel. That responsibility falls on us, our communities are supposed to help us, but even when communities fall and break apart we have the choice to stand by our values or to give them up.
In my own personal brokenness I have struggled with this idea. That even though I hate what I have seen, and hate the actions of some Christians, I am still a representation of Christ. That the bad name they generate for me, my friends and my family is one I will have to live with, and its one I must opposed. Not with angry words, not with my talents, but with my heart and the way I choose to live every day for Christ.
Even in christian circles, this is not always accepted. It's even frowned upon because it upsets the status quo. It sends out the message that we are imperfect and have work to do, even though we want to believe we have everything together. Living like Christ is a threat to those who do not want to honestly face their Creator and humble themselves before him.
I had to separate from the church for a while before I could understand this. And even in my coming back, the church is still a strange place. The customs I once found normative and comforting now seem strange, alien and foreign. My mind practically grasps how our christian cultures have been formed, how our traditions have taken place, how we have walked away from the person of Jesus. And I'm learning how to walk like Jesus, even though most days I trip and stumble.
I choose to carry on, because I believe in Christ, and what's he's done for me. What he's done for us all. I do not choose to be labeled a Christian because of what a religious organization called a church is, says, or does, but because of who Jesus is. He is someone I want to be like. Even if that means people think I'm a fraud, liar, heretic or some other form of common slur.
My prayer for your journey is that you find out who Jesus is. I can't give you a booklet to guide you on your path. I can suggest that you read the Bible and talk to God, and I can't tell you how you should do that, but I can tell you that if its a part of your daily efforts it can change your life. It's changed mine; its still changing mine.
So as our holidays come and we go our separate ways, go in peace. Go in the knowledge of our LORD and Saviour. Walk with God beside you, let him walk beside you, everywhere you go.
The purpose of our group is to glorify God and help each other. May that be who we become.
Amen.
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